11. cake - Sick Sacraments
11. cake
She exited the toilette headset attached, holding her coffee mug.
After this morning’s romp with Martin, she was looking forward to
making herself cozy for a few moments alone at her desk, with coffee,
her piece of chocolate cake and the latest edition of the Sutters Weekly.
She was itching to read her horoscope before the others arrived and
she would be too preoccupied with her working routine.
Standing at the coffee machine, straightening her hair, blouse and
skirt, she was startled when a short gum-chewing company executive
came bopping into the lobby.
“Good morning, Candi.”
“Jim! You got here fast.” She said and noted the perfect timing that
had just occurred. I thought you were stuck in traffic.”
“I was. I guess you know what day it is.” He displayed the large
bouquet of yellow tulips he had brought her at the drive through
floral shop.
Upon seeing the flowers, Candi let out a yelp of joy, put her hand to
her mouth and kissed it. “Oh my, Jim.” She exclaimed while rising.
“They’re beautiful, just beautiful.” She exchanged her empty coffee
mug for the bouquet.
She cradled the bouquet in her arms and went over to her desk where
she placed it on the counter as gently as she would place a baby in a crib.
While fetching a ceramic vase from the top of the filing cabinet, she
babbled on about how beautiful they were and how she was not
expecting anything or at least not such a big beautiful bouquet such
as the one she had just received.
Upon filling the vase with fresh spring water from the office cooler,
she returned to the counter and added an entire sachet of Flower
Power, a granulated chemical product designed to enhance the beauty
and longevity of any floral arrangement. She removed the bouquet from
the thin florist paper and stuffed the tulips into the vase, enjoying
the squeaking noises as their stems rubbed against each other while
being arranged.
“Oh Jim!” she exclaimed and took a step back to examine her gift of
flowers. “These are the prettiest, and oh, the biggest bunch of
tulips I’ve laid my dusty ol’ eyes upon in years.” She put her hands
on her hips. “So nice and yellow, and they’re not even open yet, and
when they bloom…” She whistled. “Oh, Jim. They will be so pretty,
pretty, pretty.”
“Happy Receptionist’ Day.” He repeated as Candi moved over and gave
him a kiss on the forehead.
“I said I was taking you out to lunch. I hope you don’t mind, I made
reservations at Jo Sun’s Swedish Steak Palace.” Candi did not mind at
all. She had been having a hankering lately for meat products with
that special Jo Sun’s Sweat and Sour Barbecue Sauce. She had only
been able to satisfy her cravings in the meantime with teriyaki-
flavored beef jerky which she had purchased at the liquor store on her
way home from work along with her daily lottery ticket, a can of El Jay’s
and a package of White Light.
“How did ya’ know? I’ve been thinking about meat and fish all week.
All you can eat! Oh! You’re going to make me one happy woman.”
What’s this?” Jim said, motioning to the pink pastry box sitting on the
counter in front of her desk.
“I’m afraid someone has already beat you to it.” She turned and
smiled in the direction of the cake. “Say Jim,” She said with a hint
of a mischievous tom-girl expression in her eyes knowing what she was
about to expose to him. “how would you like a piece of cake? It is a
german chocolate cake. It’s beautiful.”
“I don’t know.” He rubbed his belly. “I just had a couple of egg
rolls on my way to work. But let me see the cake anyway.”
Smiling, Candi reopened the pastry box slowly, proudly displaying its
sweetness. “So. What do you think about the cake?”
The ooze from the amputated section of the cake exalted its velvet-
like features. The cake’s creamy chocolate and sugary properties sent
him searching for adjectives. His head flushed the color of an under-
ripened tomato. His lower jaw fell open and strange sounds emanated
>from the back of his throat. His eyes rolled back into his head as
his knees weakened.
Candi fought back her fear, and ran around her desk to support him.
“Jim, Jim. Are you okay?”
After a few moments of heavy breathing, he was able to stand on his
own. He wiped his forehead with the handkerchief. In the meantime,
Candi had gone over to the water cooler and now gave Jim a coffee
mug filled with cold spring water. Jim took the mug and threw a little
green pill, produced from a small copper vial for medication, into
the back of his mouth and chased it down with a gulp of water.
The first few words Jim did mutter were difficult to comprehend, but
Candi understood enough to inform him that the cake had been given to
her by Martin Griess. He grunted, sucked in two short breaths and
exhaled Martin Griess’ name loudly. She took a step back, not
expecting this sort of enthusiasm from Jim after his spell. She
tilted her head in puzzlement, knitting her eyebrows and pouting her
mango-shaped red lips.
“You know Martin Griess!” he exclaimed. “Holy toothache. I don’t
think that I have ever seen such a yummy looking cake. He must be your
secret admirer.”
Her throat immediately tightened wondering if he noticed something
about her that gave evidence of what had just elapsed.
“Jim.” She tried to change the subject. “How come you almost fell
asleep?”
“I been having some bad side effects, so they changed the medication.
Now, I collapse at weird moments. Like when I get a craving for food
or when I get cold water splashed on me.”
“I see. How did you know that tulips are my favorites?”
“I didn’t. You’re a sunny type of gal. So, you know Martin Griess?”
“Yeah. And he is waiting for you in your office.” She pointed down
the hall.
“Look at that cake. Lord!” He wiped the back of his neck with the
handkerchief before stuffing it back into his breast pocket. “He
makes quite an impression.”
Candi only nodded and looked away. She was beginning to understand
where his line of questioning might lead and became tense at the
thought of a messy scene so early in the morning.
“Well, by the looks of this cake.” He glanced at the dark brown mass,
“He thinks rather highly of you. How often do you see him?”
“Not too often.” She blushed, wishing that he would stop referencing
the cake and not his tulips.
“How often?” Jim had a relentless tone in his voice.
“I see him maybe once a week.” She had hoped that she would never
have to admit to Jim. “Maybe twice.” She immediately regretted saying
this, putting her hand to her mouth and shaking her head, not
believing that she had volunteered this information, which she would
probably soon regret. “See Jim.” She was about to confess.
“Great. I can’t believe it. The best ad man in the valley and you
already know him!”.
“Oh no, Jim.” She hoped a call would come through and she would be
momentarily distracted. “I don’t know him that well, I just recently
met him.”
“Candi!” shaking his head. “Good grief woman. You do know him well
enough that he would devote an entire cake to you. And what a cake!
Why, it must’ve been specially ordered just for you. They don’t make
cakes like that anymore. Nor did they ever.”
“Stop talking about the cake! she screamed in her mind, falling back
into her office chair. “Okay Jim.” She was ready to make her testimony.
“You know we have been working together for the last few months. He’s
a very clever man.”
“Yes. I know.”
“I see you just made some coffee.” He went over to the beverage
counter. “Do you want a cup?” He said while pouring himself one.
“Let me see, you drink it with cream and sugar, don’t you?”
“Uh-huh.” She hummed, thinking how fast she could react in case he
threw coffee on her.
“What’s this metal bug doing on the coffee machine?”
“It’s from …” stomping her foot in the middle of her sentence to stop
her from divulging. “It’s a good luck charm but nobody wants it. It’s
been there for months. Haven’t you ever seen it?.”
“Hey, this thing is cute.” He returned to Candi’s desk and placing it
and a coffee mug inscribed with ‘Candy’ and ‘Love’, another gift she
had received from Martin, on the counter next to the chocolate cake.
Candi slowly looked up, regretting the sight of all the gifts
displayed in front of her as evidence to her crime. She scooted her
chair over to the bottom drawer of the file cabinet in her office
chair, and slowly retrieved the paper plates and the cake knife. She
rolled the chair back to her desk and placed the party supplies on
her desk and wondered if it was such a good idea to let Jim do the honors.
“Why are its eyes blinking. Is it on?”
“I don’t know. It’s alive, I guess …”
“My little girl would like it.”
“Then take it.”
“Who did you say it was from?” putting it in his pocket.
“It came in the mail. It is a promotional gimmik from a pesticide
control firm.
“You know …,” Jim said as he took the knife, unwrapped it from its
paper sheath and sliced two pieces of the cake, “… that Martin Griess
is going to be presented with a business award from the Fresno
Chamber of Commerce?” With the help of the knife, he wedged a piece
of cake free from its oval form and carefully placed it upright on a
flimsy paper plate on the counter in front of Candi. “He’s the one
responsible for saving the Raisin Festival by getting Realife to
underwrite the whole deal.”
“Yeah. He told me about that.”
“Oh yeah?” He placed the second paper plate underneath the
remaining section and simply toppled the slice over with his fingers
“I disagreed. I told him that what used to be a nice little country
fair has now turned into a marketing bonanza for elite foodists.”
“It was either that or no fair at all. The county was broke and
needed a solution.” He posed ready to cut another slice. “Did Mr.
Griess have his coffee and cake yet?”
“That is what he said. I believe so. Two scoops.”
“You know a lot about Mr. Griess. It won’t hurt him to have another
slice, though. You know about the new plant in Sacramento.” He leaned
over the counter and lowering his voice, “I have spoken to Mr.
Thorndorn. I’m going to ask him today if he’d like to join our team.
That’s why he’s here early. Mr. Thorndorn is coming in, in a half an
hour.”
“Is that so?” Candi calmly realised that his line of questioning was
not directed at her love life but to Martin’s career.
“It would be such a surprise if I could announce to the boys that Mr.
Griess is working for Realife!” He said triumphantly and licked his
fingers.
Candi had already applied for the transfer. If all worked well, she
would be out of the armpit of california within a year. Her mind
worked furiously and she instantly imagined Martin, leaving his wife
and starting a new life with her in the delta.
“Damn! This coffee is strong. Geez Candi, did you put in half the
bag?” Candi forced a smile without responding. “Now I remember why I
don’t normally go near the coffee machine.” He went back to add non-
dairy creamer.
“So Jim. What are you hiring Mr. Griess to do?” She asked, curious to
what could be her possible future.
“Good morning Miss Powers.” Mr. Thorndorn briskly walked into the
office lobby, almost bumping Mr. Cole returning to Candi’s desk with
a full mug.
“Good Morning.” They both said, with Jim manoeuvering in order not to
spill a drop.
“Sorry Jim. Have you seen Mr. Griess yet?”
“He’s in my office. I am going in right now.”
“I’ll drop by in a half an hour.” He turned to Candi, “Has Mr. Pickel
come in with the donuts? What’s that on your desk?”
“It’s from Mr. Griess. Would you like some?” She handed him the
already cut piece originally prepared for herself.
“It’s a day of honor for receptionists.” Jim was already cutting a
piece for himself. As he clipped a wedge from the now diminishing
chocolate wonder onto a paper plate, he managed to smear some
frosting on his sleave jacket.
“Oh right.” He looked at Jim. “Are we taking Miss Powers out to lunch?”
“I made reservations at Joe Sun’s at noon.”
“Good thinking.”
Candi heard an oncoming call and responded with the customary
greeting. “Mr. Thorndorn?” she looked at her boss for confirmation.
“Yeah. He’s in. May I ask who’s calling? One moment, please.” She
pressed the hold button.
“Do you want to take it here?” She picked up a reciever and handed it
to Mr. Thorndorn.
“I’ll take it now. Give it to me. Who is it?” Without waiting for a
response from the receptionist, he put the receiver to his ear.
“Mr. Thorndorn here.”
There was a moment of silence before a low and muffled voice on the
other end of the line slowly uttered, “There is a bomb planted at the
number three building and will go off at 1 p.m. We are the
Opportunists. Don’t go to the capitol. Remain clever with money.” The
line went dead.
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